I Have Rust

FullSizeRender.jpg

Rust is ugly.

It’s hard to show my rust.  My husband and I are not rust kind of people.  We both work hard to keep rust scratches and dents from happening. We don’t like rust to show.

Some of you are like, get over yourself, rust is reality, don’t be such a snob. But there are others of you who know exactly how I feel. It’s hard to let the ugly truth just hang out in the open where everyone can see it.

Rust is eventual in the big scheme of things.

We bought our suburban 12 years ago knowing that it would be the car for the long haul.  The vehicle of investment that would facilitate our family need for a long period of time.  The thing is, it’s gone on much longer than either my husband or I had expected.  This is a good thing because we’ve needed it go keep rambling.  As diligently as we’ve tended to its’ engine and body, rust could not be kept from settling in.  Long term vehicle use in a snowy climate is subject to the effects of salt. Rust. It’s inevitable, but not terminal.  The suburban keeps on, keeping on. Doing what she was meant to do.

Symbol of longevity.

The rust on my car tells a story.  It speaks of the many years and miles we’ve shared caring for our family. The rust is her wrinkles. Although it takes a little more effort these days, she has not given up. She has been many places and seen many things. Always an integral part of life.

I notice now more than ever all the ways there are to make ourselves appear younger than we are.  The ways we can cover up rust and not let anyone know we’ve traveled many miles and been many places.  And I ask, why?  Experience is the badge of longevity and wisdom often follows.  Who doesn’t want that?  Who doesn’t want their life to read like a really cool story?

Silent sickness.

The patterns of rust that have formed on my car are in places where water and salt have sat longer than they should. The corrosion of rust began forming a long time ago in these unseen places and they have finally ripped through the steel. We didn’t know these spots on the car were vulnerable, that is why they are vulnerable. We often cannot see our area of weakness until some rust has formed.

Anytime we commit ourselves to loving other people long term, whether it be family, friends, c0-workers, church etc., our vulnerabilities will show up.  We don’t want them to but they will.

Love brings out the good and the weak inside of us.  It’s supposed to.

I said before that I don’t like my rust to show. I really don’t. But I think one of the greatest gifts we receive from being in long term love is accepting the rust in our lives. Not to shame us but to show our humanity and our need for extra TLC in certain places.  Love comes to accept and offer healing rather than destroy our self worth.

Rust sometimes has to form first before we know corrosion has taken place.

How many times have you had the same conversation with a loved one where they claim you “just don’t see it” or “this happens every time”?  You probably have some rust.

Don’t let the rust scare you.

Rust can be problematic but it doesn’t have to be cataclysmic. You can keep rambling down the road with rust as long as you know where it is and are actively tending to it. My tendency is to hide it and not deal with it.

Sometimes you can bounce around from friend or family group, never really letting anyone stay long enough or get close enough to see your rust. It feels comfortable at first but eventually you end up hiding and never get to experience what love and healing can do when they are mixed.

So, I have rust.

I don’t like it.

I don’t want you to see it.

But you have rust too.

Now we are not so alone.

…for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God ~ Romans 3:23

Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, ~ John 17:3

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s